S has a new (terrifying) friend

September 2005

This post could aptly be named Mommy has a Heart Attack!

It's a Saturday morning and W has gone mountain biking and I am home alone with S, A, G and C. We've lived in California all of two months and I am starting to get into a routine (or so I thought). So here I am feeding the triplets and Gretta is barking to be let out so S offers to go to the backdoor to let her out. She yells from the door that she is going out to play. Time ticks by and I don't hear her harassing Gretta as she usually does so I yell from the living room for her and she yells back "I'm still playing". That satisfies me and I go on about my business of burping babies knowing there couldn't be much she could get into in that backyard and Gretta was out there with her just a few short steps away. I get up to go to the front door to grab the newspaper and I never even heard her come in. I turn to see S and then I see IT. The big furry IT she was holding in her hand right above C's head. I couldn't think straight. I panicked! What was it? Was it dead or alive? Oh god what would I do if she dropped it? Where is Walter when I need him? Then loud and clear S announces "she's my friend". I began to scream for S to take IT outside (at this point I was guessing IT was a rat but I still wasn't sure because I was still to scared to get a close look). Again my thoughts are interrupted mid scream as S whispers in her loudest whisper "Hush mom you are going to wake my friend she's sleeping." Again I envision her dropping IT on C and dead or alive I was going to actually have to look at it and pick it up. I tried to pull myself together and calmly convince S IT needs to sleep outside. S laid "her" by the backdoor and I prayed whatever SHE was SHE was far enough away I would be able to swing the door shut and so I did. I finally got the nerve to peek out the window to see S's sleepy friend. An opossum, yuck! S was bewildered as to why I was so crazy. I kept thinking oh my god opossum, what if it's playing possum? Then I freaked and drug S to the sink to wash her hands in antibacterial soap. I called my mom in tears begging her to tell me what to do. (The fact that she was 2000 miles away didn't matter I wanted my mommy). All I got from the other end of the line was laughter. I wasn't laughing I was praying for W to come home and rid us of S's sleepy friend. I continued on it panic and decided hand washing was clearly not enough so off to the bath S went and she was scrubbed from head to toe. After the bath S wanted to see if her friend had woken up. Of course my reply included she had to wait for daddy. In the meantime we spoke about not picking up animals in the backyard and all I could think of was how much I hated California (of course I guess this could have happened anywhere). Finally I got the details of what happened and how the opossum came to be her friend. Apparently it had fallen from the tree, Gretta retrieved it and brought to S as a present. At that moment I despised Gretta more than California. Finally W arrives home and I tell him about S's friend. He opens the door and screams like a girl. Once he gained his composure next thing I know he has a paper towel and picks up the offending friend up by the tail and chases us around the house with her. Then the talk has to inevitably follow that her sleepy friend had died and that she should never ever pick up or touch an animal without asking mommy or daddy first. So after some discussion S loads up into the car with W to let her dead friend go. I think she ended up in the dumpster behind McDonalds. Well one thing I know for sure is that experience took years off my life and I also realized at that moment S wasn't scared of anything and that terrified me. Now S gets a gentle reminder when she goes into the backyard to not pick up anything. She came in this morning to tell me I need to come see the snake! I cautiously walked into the backyard to see the big "snake" tree limb that S proceeded to pick up and chase Gretta around the backyard gleefully screaming "HISS, HISS". This was one snake I could handle.